August 13,1981 I cried before the LORD GOD in my hour of great need. Even though I had no idea who god was, I felt the desire to call out to Him to save what was a wreck of a life.
As I laid on the floor weeping in my despair, my past was revealed to me and in all the times that I sought to end my live, God sent someone to encourage me, lift me up or in some way rescue me. I asked why was this so, why did it matter that I live? And I was answered in a clear and totally honest voice that still clings to me, “Because I died that you may have Life!”
It was revealed that even before I was born, God had a purpose and a goal for my life. Now after 29 years, I still marvel that God should think so highly of me that even though I despised Him and the teaching of His Son, that he saw fit to use me, again and again. I liken myself much as Paul the Apostle for whom I was named. In my past I ridiculed Christians as vain, stupid people following a myth and a lie. But because of the Truth that was revealed to me during those early morning hours, I found that I was the vain and silly fool.
When ever I start to think to highly of myself, I am reminded of hte person I once was and how only when I surrendered myself to God’s will, was I made truly alive. This is the birthday of my salvation but yet it isn’t for I was saved on the cross and accepted even before the beginning of time. Do you remember the hour you first believed?
